It costs me my most courageous intentions to write something about someone. Unlike writing feature articles about a controversial act, a rising star or my newest favorite band, I don't write swiftly on special occassions like writing something personally special. I always arrive at verbal crisis. Unless I become flooded with memories of endless laughs, bad mornings, childish disasters, natural happiness and anticipated tears, I remain staggering on my sheet. I admit that I am not a little boy anymore who bursts into tears when someone close to him goes away. I'm supposed to look ironclad who's mentally ready to understand how to let go of certain things. But when you were inspired by that person who is about to leave, writing something like this, with intense emotions, I tell you, is one of those tough jobs you would never wish to do again.
As far as the photo shows, the man that I am featuring here is GODOFREDO G. LOPEZ, JR. His name is a cannon at Mindanao State University Main Campus' College of Engineering. After six long years of struggle, he endured crossing the semi-impermeable dark tunnel of an Engineering student life. He went through sleepless nights, countless equations, death-defying problems and pressured undertaking. The good thing at the end of it, he graduated with flying colors after ripping off BS Electrical Engineering (EE) and BS Electronics & Communications Engineering (ECE). If you didn't pause at the word 'and' between the two courses, you might not get the answer why he's a cannon. A student leader as he was, he tried juggling 3 balls: his academic life, his public service and his family responsibilities. And to conclude, he's a good juggler. But for a background, what I mentioned won't be enough. Nevertheless, what I am writing is not found on the test papers he nailed or on the awards he had. What I am writing is the kind of man that he is. How he touches lives in his own simple ways. And so to speak, I am one of those people lucky enough to have met him.
He already was on his 3rd year in ECE when I set foot in the dormitory. He was there. Silent and thin. Well, almost not there really. He wasn't the stranger-friendly type. Even if he's a Catholic like me and there's somewhat a religious clustering that exists in the dorm, he barely talked to me at first. I don't approach people who's not a talker, you know that. Not until he was with his roommates inviting other dorm occupants for a victory party of their then prizewinning room. That's how I met him. The real meeting. He's jolly and companionable. And I stood corrected, he's much a talker. I swear.
My earliest college year went on that way. He was among those few people I shared emotional thoughts with every saturday night, those who walked out with me to buy food for meals, those who sang with me almost embarrassingly during laundry sessions at the dorm's communal bath/comfort room, those who waited at night to pour the hot water in our cups for coffee, those who took courage strolling the Commercial Center at night even just to get some fresh air, those who went to church with me on Sundays and on special events, those who smiled with me in front of every camera available, those who were horror story-sharers during blackouts and many other those-who's that are treasured in my mental diary. Kuya Godo was there. Patient. Eager. And sometimes exhausted. But he stayed. He still existed. He was there longer than what we expected him to be.
When the other kuyas had left, Kuya Godo chose to stay, to continue the agony which soon became a success by proceeding to EE for another year. I know this must have been a very difficult decision for him. In all its spite, it was all worth it then. From the man I knew he was, he even transformed to someone more radically sober. He tried doing a changed lifestyle. He even updated his love life. Even if he was older than anyone in our pack in the dorm, he never let us feel that he's different. His thinking got more mature. He stretched more understanding for the younger guys who gradually treated him like a father. Like someone whose decisions must be considered, whose actions must be pondered on, and whose advises must be sought. It's exactly with this father factor that qualifies him with an immediate wedding after topping his board exam.
Personally, I became closer to Kuya Godo when I started to sleep beside him in his bed every night. I felt like I needed some sort of implicit protection with all other Kuyas gone. I'm not certain where that habit originated but I know I stayed doing that for a year. I like sharing bedtime stories with him. Mostly, he spoke of all the fun and joyful moments he had during the day. And sometimes, at very special times, he spoke of reasons why he had to sweat hardcore, to shed tears, to decide on giving up or to devote his all life to the things which he desires to achieve. Either because of his family's hope from Tandag or from peer pressure of all those people who expected great from him, he stood up every morning with renewed chances. That's one of his fragile points that I have witnessed. But unlike me, he's always positive and often blessed after everything. It makes me shake my head, smile and wonder why.
For the fun, he's got a mean and childish side too that's a source of frequent pandemoniums in our circle of friends. He always lets others borrow his laptop but sometimes, he denies the existence of it inside his locker. Sometimes, when someone asks him if he has something, he asks first that person back if he has thing too. Very mean. While studying, I mean when you study too beside him, get ready for an out-of-nowhere punch in your shoulder. That is the start of his rest in studying. You will ever regret not giving him a share of food you're eating when his eyes are glued to it. Next time he has food, you will never have your share. In other times too, he gets so high-tempered with a single individual. When he sees this guy-of-the-day, he teases, scolds, and warns him all the time. And lately, he never let anyone drop a single touch in his bed. Well, I know some reasons behind some of these jerky gestures. But with regards to the others, will we ever know Kuya Godo? *paint the most wicked smiley here*
The melodramatic stuff comes whenever I think of going inside the dorm without him around. How can I not falter on my ways if I got used in living within his shadows? No matter what season, I and the others always take a time to go inside his room, talk about the craziest topics under the sun, bully a random invidual within the four corners, or to do anything with his laptop, our group laptop. Now that his laptop, I mean Kuya Godo is gone, I don't know if we'd still get to do such things like we used to. Will it ever matter to the way we have been bracing ourselves? The ones who are left? Answering this is painful. I notice it. There's something that tells me that I'm not just losing a father but also vanishing a part of something I call HOME as well. Without his indescribable humor, moral support, kind advices and elderly supervision, I would definitely take much time to adjust with things that I got accustomed with.
Now that he's off to face the part in which he has to bid goodbye and break free, I sense that this moment is like unclenching my hands to let go of a bird which I loved and cared for so much. I'm doing that because I know that its will is to find somewhere it is destined to be. Somewhere it rightfully belongs. A place where it can spread its beautiful wings and show the world that it can finally fly. Just so Kuya Godo know, I would always look up to him while he reaches the top of the stair he is climbing. Holding the influence he left, I'm proud of everything about him. We all are. He can do everything just as what I learned from him says: "It doesn't matter if it is hard. If it is not impossible. It can always be done."
P.S. -> Kuya Godo, break a long leg! We'll see each other soon. God bless you! :)
